Before I had my first child, I taught junior high for 10 years.  After a 1-year maternity leave and then went back to full-time teaching and high school counseling.  So, by the time my oldest entered junior high / middle school, I had over 20 years of experience working with teens. 

Despite all of that experience, I was shocked when my own children started displaying ‘typical’ teen behavior. 

Almost daily, I had to revisit what I knew and had learned about teens … just so that I wouldn’t lose my mind!  I had to remind myself that my children were just like almost every other teen out there (although far more special)!!!!!

For those of you struggling with what your sweet, innocent child has morphed into as a teen, let me share with you the key things that I learned through my experiences as a junior high / middle teacher.  My knowledge comes not only from classroom experience. It also comes from professional development sessions and courses that I took during my Bachelor of Education and Master of Education degrees. 

So, Mommas …. here’s hoping that I can put your minds at ease!

Your teenager, despite all that you might think, is normal!

• Teen years = TONS of cognitive, hormonal and physical changes (thank-you, puberty!)

• These changes result in identify confusion and a reorganization of priorities.

• Socializing takes precedence; a longing to fit in and belong to peer groups.

• Friends offer better advice than parents. (Boo!!!!)

• These years place our teens into a stage where they feel that they are not being allowed to ‘grow up’.

• They feel that they are misunderstood and that they cannot possibly meet all of the expectations set out by parents.

We then throw these hormonally-driven young ones into a junior high / middle school setting. 

As if the pubertal challenges weren’t enough, junior high / middle school comes with its own set of challenges.

• Academically, grades 7-9 are much more demanding than the elementary grades.

• More abstract concepts are being discussed in class.

• There are now greater behavioral expectations.  Students are expected to assume full responsibility for their actions and behavior.

• Social media results in ‘comparing oneself’ to others. Despite all of our ‘you’re perfect just the way you are’ and ‘don’t be bothered by what she said’ comments, our teens are always worried about what others think.

• Cell phones. They capture everything.  And, virtually every student has a cell phone in hand.    When something funny or embarrassing happens, someone has inevitably captured it on camera.  And posts it.  No wonder our teens can never truly let their guard down.

Hang in there, Mommas.  As the old adage goes … this, too, shall pass!

In the interim, hold your teens close.  Love them unconditionally.  Don’t judge them.  Let them spread their wings.  Be there to catch them when they fall.  Be their biggest cheerleader.  And know, that this insanity is temporary.

Mommas – this might be a good time to head over to the Discussion Board (hyperlinked and available from the sidebar on the right of this screen.  What are you struggling with when it comes to your teen(s)?

Let’s talk.  Let’s support each other.  Let’s not judge.  Let’s lean on each other as we ride this crazy wave.

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